[Fitz isn’t keen on letting him slip past this conversation, as much as Markus would prefer to point the spotlight in a different direction altogether. But he’s a good friend, and he won’t do him the disservice of not engaging with the point being made.
As much as disagreement bristles against his conveyance of thought.]
I won’t lose someone important to me like that again, Fitz. Standing idly by when action can be taken.
[If he had stopped Leo that night, if he had ended the conflict instead of letting it escalate, instead of merely allowing him to act the way he did— would things have turned out differently? Would he have spared Carl the spike of stress that was the undoing of a weak heart? Markus never wants to feel that helpless again, never wants to let that brand of sorrow wring him inside-out. He’s afraid to experience it a second time.
Fitz isn't wrong in his own thoughts. Dying is easy. Dying is easy if it means someone else can live, if a cause can continue carving out a path, if it’s the right thing to do in the face of adversity. His greatest trait, and his worst failing, how strictly Markus adheres to this belief.]
I simply can’t.
I’d make the same choice again, a hundred times over. I can’t abide by a scenario where in which Connor is harmed because I’ve chosen to protect myself instead. I know that maybe it’s not fair to him, but that’s the reality.
no subject
As much as disagreement bristles against his conveyance of thought.]
I won’t lose someone important to me like that again, Fitz. Standing idly by when action can be taken.
[If he had stopped Leo that night, if he had ended the conflict instead of letting it escalate, instead of merely allowing him to act the way he did— would things have turned out differently? Would he have spared Carl the spike of stress that was the undoing of a weak heart? Markus never wants to feel that helpless again, never wants to let that brand of sorrow wring him inside-out. He’s afraid to experience it a second time.
Fitz isn't wrong in his own thoughts. Dying is easy. Dying is easy if it means someone else can live, if a cause can continue carving out a path, if it’s the right thing to do in the face of adversity. His greatest trait, and his worst failing, how strictly Markus adheres to this belief.]
I simply can’t.
I’d make the same choice again, a hundred times over. I can’t abide by a scenario where in which Connor is harmed because I’ve chosen to protect myself instead. I know that maybe it’s not fair to him, but that’s the reality.